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One of Hap Shaughnessy's traits is the number of tall tales he tells at any given time to the members of Possum Lodge, usually to Red and Harold. Listed below are all the claims of his by season.

Tall tales by seasonEdit

Season 1Edit

Episode Claim
The Big Inboard
  • Drilling for gunpowder
He-Man Contest
  • Was a bush pilot, piloting felled trees to a sawmill in a raft made out of a real bush
Wind-Powered Boat

Season 3Edit

Episode Claim
Car Pool
  • Can identify a top-secret explosive device
    • The explosive seen was used by both the Israelis and the Turks
The Spawning Grounds
  • Ate dinosaur meat when he thawed out a frozen dinosaur while leading a group of diggers through Greenland
    • Dinosaur meat is gamier than anaconda, but not as fatty as killer whale
Magnetic Lake
  • Was an astronaut
  • Met Howard Hughes, "the worst liar [Hap] ever met"
  • Dressing in aluminum foil might allow him to travel in time
  • Ernest Hemingway showed him a trick to starting a boat
  • Made a lot of enemies during his work in the C.I.A.
Fire Brigade
Green Green
Biosphere Three
  • Used Morse code to inform his squad he captured an enemy battalion during World War II
    • Had to decline the medal because he had no room on his tunic for any more

Season 5Edit

Episode Claim
The Driving Test
  • Fought a whale (whom he thinks is the white whale Moby Richard) for "ten, twenty months" by holding onto its tail until it died from exhaustion
The Network Deal
X Marks The Spot
  • Was an elephant wrestler before that got banned
    • Elephant wrestlers were never respected and that it was after it became a demonstration sport in the 1956 Olympics in Oslo, as a winter event (even though wrestling is usually a summer event)
  • Elephant wrestling is a tag match
    • Hap's tag partner was named Wally
The Lost Dog
The Big Thing
  • Was in the Guinness Book of World Records, for "world's longest kiss", "world's strongest man", "world's fattest man" (972 pounds), "most weight ever lost by one person" (801 pounds) and "longest bungee jump" (those last two were set the same day)
  • All of Hap's records have since been broken
The Not-Chicken Franchise

(Pertaining to getting Red to try and guess the word in the Word Game, which is "friends")

Season 6Edit

Episode Claim
The Science Fair
  • Invented basketball
  • Was involved with Teddy's Rough Riders
  • Did some hush-hush work for the C.I.A., asked to come up a cover story for what he did for a living, and he chose "sports inventor"
  • James Naismith (the real inventor of basketball) was his C.I.A. cover name
The Petting Zoo
  • His mother was Anastasia, who moved to France and then immigrated to Canada
    • While in France, his mother had a fling with Ernest Hemingway

Season 7Edit

Episode Claim
Running Of The Bulls
  • Ran the marathon twice at the 1988 Olympics in Seoul, Korea, representing Sierra Leone
  • Treated everyone near him to a banquet of dogs, which he claims is a Korean delicacy and tastes like wolf
  • Was a technical adviser on the movie Ghost, after Harold points out that Hap's near-death experience sounded like scenes from that movie
Swiss It Up
  • Was a member of the Toronto Maple Leafs in 1967, wearing a jersey with the number 13 on it
    • Collected the autographs of all the team members
    • Taught all of the team members how to write, thus explaining how their signatures have the same handwriting as his own
The Movie
Expropriation
  • Owns a painting originally from the Louvre in Paris
The Splinter Lodge
  • Was the human cannonball in a local circus
    • Flew 88 miles into the air in nothing but a cape, then landed safely in a haystack
The Good Old Hockey Game
  • Thinks Santa Claus may have visited his house and bent his fireplace grate

Season 8Edit

Episode Claim
The Cult Visit
College Life
  • Mona Lisa, the person, was a member of the Shaughnessy family
The New Monument

(About both himself and a prospective new lodge member)

  • Worked at the Casbah Coffee Club and recommended that the club's manager hire The Beatles
    • Was asked to be the manager for The Beatles
  • Was a freelance part-time gigolo and traveled the world
It's A Wonderful Red Green Christmas

Season 9Edit

Episode Claim
Lady In Red
  • Honest John Jonassen asked him for to help with Possum Lake's bid for the 1986 Winter Olympics, by bribing the officials
  • Last Olympic gold medal was in pickling
The Bachelor Auction
  • Owns a white glove once owned by Napoleon Bonaparte, given to Hap by Napoleon's great-grandson, Bob
    • Hap saved Bob's life during a Satan's Choice meeting he attended dressed as a mime
School Bus Blimp
  • Fought in the Korean War
  • A hand grenade inside his helmet went off while he wore it
    • The exploded grenade damaged his head and caused him to need a metal plate that has become magnetized to any metal, even aluminum
  • His head now only points north
Rent A Wreck
  • Enlisted with the Manning triplets in the Possum County Light Dragoon Highlanders of Foot Rifles
Curse Of The Mummy
  • Owns a lie detector
  • Swam under both poles, climbed Mount Fuji and landed on the moon (to test out the detector)
  • Set a land-speed record by mounting a 747 engine to a grocery cart
  • Has his own thermal nuclear generator
  • Met Eisenhower, who wanted him to meet Churchill
The Battle Call
  • Was a Hollywood movie star
Hurricane Doug
  • Had his own rock 'n' roll band in the 1950s called Hap Hornet and the Rockin' Drones
    • Had a gold record in 1958: "Gotta Lotta Hotta Watta"
  • Taught Elvis how to play the guitar
  • Knows Ann-Margret
Guinness World Records
  • Performed with Ringling Brothers, swallowing swords while traversing the high wire doing a headstand on a unicycle seat
    • Courted the bearded lady

Season 10Edit

Episode Claim
A Very Merry Red Green Christmas
  • His house is the last stop on Santa's route before returning to the North Pole

Season 12Edit

Episode Claim
Possum Air
A Lot Like Christmas
  • Saw Santa's sleigh (which the Pentagon had confused for an unidentified aircraft) flying near the Soviet Union on Christmas Eve 1963

Season 13Edit

Episode Claim
The Spelling Bee
  • Was a chauffeur to a famous boxer in 1964
  • Had a quantum physics theory and was arguing about it with the people in his limo

Season 15Edit

Episode Claim
Do As I Do
  • Supposedly went on to become ambassador to Guam after the show ended

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