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Red's Sage Advice is one of the longest-running segments on The Red Green Show, in which Red Green sits behind a desk in Possum Lodge and tells a story to the viewer. Nearly all of his advice is geared toward men, even though he may be addressing their wives or children in some cases. Stories vary widely and have included "Apologizing to your wife", "Don't get mad, get even", and "How to avoid becoming an old geezer". Each segment ended with Red saying the catchphrase: "Remember, I'm pulling for you. We're all in this together." In The House Raising (Season 6), Harold Green sits in for Red and talks about older men, advising them on how to tell their favorite stories without annoying younger people. He closes with a variation on Red's signature catchphrase: "Remember, you're on your own. Don't push it." Because this segment is never referred to by name in the show, "Red's Sage Advice" is given as a working title. Other similar segments include Red's Advice to Teenagers and Buddy System, in which two Lodge members trade off in giving rapid-fire advice to men facing trouble in their relationships. This segment debuted in Season 4 and ran through the end of the series.

StoriesEdit

Season 4Edit

Episode Story
The Beef Project Why not to say anything when you have nothing to say
The Hydrogen Project Why not to get eyeglasses
The Badger Project The whereabouts of Red's generation's music
The Electrical Project Why older men should leave their shirts on
The Marine Show Project Revising one's dreams to something more realistic
The Ski & Golf Project Clues that your body is changing
The Rustproofing Project You have been invited to play bridge
The Movie Project Couples who have been married a long time
The Painted Leaves Project How to tell when you are about to lose your job
The Stuck Truck Project About losing your sex drive
The Group Photo Project Why you now feel tired all the time
The Mt. Rushmore Project If you've just turned 50

Season 5Edit

Episode Story
The Satellite Dish Hints that you may be middle-aged
Father and Son Banquet How to respond to your wife getting you new clothes
The New Doctor How not to drive like your dad
Medieval Times Why do young women start flirting with you?
Possum Lodge Radio You can barely keep your eyes open and it's only 8:30!
Sedgwick the Thief When you suddenly have new neighbors
The Cement Load A word about.....memory loss
The Gas Shortage When you discover you have wrinkles
The Lost Dog How to enjoy hobbies without sharing your toys with your kids
One Man's Garbage On trying to look young again
Bottled Water Why not to date your old girlfriend
The Not-Chicken Franchise Still looking good
Homemade Cheese Middle-aged men know everything

Season 6Edit

Episode Story
The Science Fair Why men don't ask for directions when lost
Sedgwick The Tenant How men fix everything with duct tape
The Driving Lesson The truth about wisdom and how to fake it
The Tax Refund Your wife's urge to have that one more child
No Church Motivation towards diet and exercise
Good Goverment Enjoy yourself now rather than wait for retirement
The Poker Game Give your kids good advice
The Drill When your husband has nothing to show for his whole life
Bernice's Birthday If you're thinking about getting re-married
The Church Casino Becoming a step-dad for the first time
The Love Boat On realizing you don't know everything
The Girlfriend About signing up for baseball at your age
The New Lease Scary thoughts in the middle of the night
The Baseball Tryouts Your friends are starting to look old
30 Minutes or Free Red talks about self-help books
Fund Raiser You can't control what people say about you after you're dead
Real Estate The seven stages of parking

Season 7Edit

Episode Story
Running Of The Bulls How men and women see relationships differently
Swiss It Up How to use your inheritance to get favors
The Implosion How problems can be solved with pills
Adopt-A-Highway The fact that everyone around you (except you) is an idiot
The Strange Ranger Improving yourself through shortcuts instead of a self-help guru
Big Guy Little Guy How to out-talk a woman by just saying "Yes, dear"
The Movie A correlation between loud music and new music
Expropriation When to go back to church
The Stool Pigeons Modern art
Celebrity Making split decisions
Let Me Count The Ways Replacing tools with future heirlooms
Pardi Gras Your new boss who is younger than you
The Splinter Lodge Things changing
The Good Old Hockey Game Why not to worry when people are angry
Step Outside Romance and temperatures
The Town Mall Sharing feelings

Season 8Edit

Episode Story
Harold's Leaving How to foil your wife's urge to make you over
House Moving When you get old, you can start telling the truth
Neither Rain Nor Sleet How to deal with new technology
The Cult Visit "Your body is your home. If it suits you, why renovate?"
College Life Territorial behavior in the parking lot
Free Apricots Tools and friendship
The Mayor Race Being an outcast, standing tall, alone, and apologizing for it
Better To Give Than Receive How to apologize to your wife
Town Services Contract Getting unusual soap as a present
It's A Wonderful Red Green Christmas "Is there a Santa Claus?"
Life Cycle Why to get eyeglasses
Mad About You How to tell a war story when you don't have one
Bingo Was His Name How to recover from missing a special occasion

Season 9Edit

Episode Story
Harold's Job Marriage problems
The Fishing Derby "Watch this"
The Bachelor Auction Men getting chest implants
Angel Your kids as future caregivers
School Bus Blimp "I forgot what I was going to say"
Coup De Grass Getting in trouble for trying to help out
Rent A Wreck Why not to get facelifts
Curse Of The Mummy Why not to fix anything that is broken
Roll Out The Barrels Men trying to find names in the obituary
No Retreat Men over the age of 45 should not expect much from their bodies
The Battle Call What to do when a woman asks "Do I look old?"
Hurricane Doug When not to say anything
Guinness World Records "Don't get mad, get even"
The Auto Club Conspicuous consumption

Season 10Edit

Episode Story
Sausage Envy Difference between the way men and women shop
Foster Child Arguing
What A Dump The risks middle-aged men take
Winston's Wedding Technology
Man Of The Year Picking the right friend for heavy-lifting projects
Survivor Selectively losing your senses
Historic Site Memory loss
Twinning Turning out like your parents
Lunar Eclipse Staring at stuff
Barter Starter Superpowers
Out Of The Woods The description of a junk junkie
Cheap Jeep When you should keep your mouth shut
DNA All The Way The law of diminishing returns
Who Wants To Be A Smart Guy Wives making lists
The Beaver Dam How to have good manners and how bad manners will be in the future
The Dandruff Foundation How chemistry and testosterone are the main components of men
Damn You Emu Why not to ask for help on a project
No Duct Tape Men and women's views of parties

Season 11Edit

Episode Story
New Job In Town Your wife says you have too much junk in the garage
Gladiator Make yourself look "good for your age" with a fake I.D.
The Whooping Crane When a couple stops to ask for directions
Back To Nature A word about self-confidence and people skills
Dalton's Hot Gift Even tough guys can be crippled by a cold
Viva Las Possums A word about men's magazines and women's opinion of them
Y2 Cans Your friends are starting to sound like old geezers
The Ghost Of Possum Lodge When you start talking to yourself
The Chainsaw Races Lessons you need to learn as a married man
Something In The Heir Taking care of your parents
Daredevil The temptation to quit and try something new
Mike Goes Straight A use for ugly, unflattering pictures of yourself
Xmas In July Success and failure
The Fishing Derby Some thoughts on having a successful marriage
Harold's Dilemma A word about stupid and careless drivers
Red Green Does New Years The midnight kiss

Season 12Edit

Episode Story
Go Fish A word about getting older
The Possum Ponderosa Men are naturally untidy
Possum Air Don't try exploring the wilderness at your age
The I.Q. Test If you're thinking about changing careers
The Day Of The Sunflowers If you haven't taken very good care of your body
Reality Television A word about cellular phones
Possum Lake Provincial Park "When does middle-age begin?"
The Silver Wasp A word about your wardrobe
Snowed In Morning people shouldn't marry night people
The Go Go Bars About encouraging your kids
The Missile Crisis Don't mistake useless trivia for knowledge
Never Send A Man Red talks about life before computers
Power Struggle Telling a story as a couple
Mr. Possum Lake How couples dress after ten years of marriage
Red and Breakfast When your wife goes shopping with you
The Moosetrap When your wife is disappointed in your gift
Stupid Cupid Red talks about bald spots

Season 13Edit

Episode Story
You've Got Oil Watch your language
The Drive-Thru Reading ads in public restrooms
School Demo Fantasizing about younger women
Change Will Do You Good Moving into a smaller house once the kids are gone
The Earring Red ran into an old friend who is "going great"
Mailbox Wars If you've had a beard for years, don't think about shaving
The String Ball Using your free time after you retire
The Spelling Bee Why men draw so much attention to themselves
Pay It Forward A word about men shaving their bodies
Possum Day When the kids start asking about the inheritance
The Boat Ramp When your looks start to go
Comrade Harold The stages of life are like sandwiches
Spokesman Red How a song can define a relationship
The Chain Letter Thing started going bad when they invented automatic transmissions
The Women's Circle Being on the wrong side of the "generation gap"
Ranger Harold When your body doesn't obey your orders anymore
The Sinkhole Not being the center of attention anymore

Season 14Edit

Episode Story
Red's Hot Sauce Men own many different vehicles in their lifetime
Life Is a Circus When you're too old to be playing sports
Once More to the Well There are people out there much smarter (and younger) than you
The Statue A word about your eating habits
False Idol Older men should not be doing any wild dancing
Harold's One and Only Recognize when it's too late to do something
The Grapes of Wrath Women have higher expectations than we do
The Lodge Election Love is not "never having to say you're sorry"
Ticket to Fame Red has started losing things
Stay Tuned Nostagia for the 80's
The Butter Man Losing your excitement for the holiday season
Red Green Insurance Brand new jeans with that "lived in" look
Lodge Luau When you start needing glasses
Hoard of the Flies Father and son businesses
A Shot in the Dark When people turn to you for advice
Bye Bye Bonnie Red talks to women about the changing needs of men in the bedroom
Fishy CANUSA Games Advice for any couples who have been married a while
The Possum Drop When you need to find a girlfriend for your wife

Season 15Edit

Episode Subject
Rules of Engagement Red criticizes bloggers
The Folk Art Convention The value of public relations
Mr. Clean It never hurts to buy a gift for your significant other
No Tell Boatel Why did I get into television?
Cell Hell The value of arguing with your spouse
Cart Blanche Great packaging and names can help sell things
New Yorkshire Puddings Broadcasting poker on TV
Exit Stag Right Older men and loose change
Mad You Say? Leaving things till the last minute
No Place Like the Home Needing more income
Flying Blind The value of foresight
The Bigger the Better "Men don't communicate"
The Big Retreat Passing milestones
Rites of Passage When teenage playboys get older
Sasquatch Comedians don't tell jokes anymore
Rain Man High-definition televisions
Love is in the Air Nobody wants to listen to you anymore
Toe the Line When you get crabby no one wants to be around you
Do As I Do Saying goodbye

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